Another year gone, another one looming in front of me like a large scary tunnel. It seems that whatever we do, time inevitably moves us on. We get older, we occasionally get wiser- in most cases probably not- and every year, like clock work, I see those typical statuses on social media, ‘OK. New year. New me.’ or ‘my new years resolution is….’ etc. etc.
Now I think that setting an unreasonable goal to lose a certain amount of weight, save a certain amount of money or do something obscure like learn to play guitar is a bit far-fetched and unnecessary. Having said that, if you must use the turning of a new year to do something; then do something achievable, reasonable and most importantly- don’t be too hard on yourself if you don’t get to do it exactly how you planned. For example; in 2016 my ‘resolution’ if you want to name it that was to take more risks in my life, and not be afraid to say yes to certain situations. Now I know what you’re thinking, it sounds like this guy…
YES MAN YES MAN
Rest assured; I shan’t be accepting mail-order brides from an Eastern European country or going to any weird-arse seminars. Although being BFFs with Zoe Deschanel would be freaking awesome.
Last years decision making ended up with me drastically changing my life. I met someone who knows me better than I know myself, and loves me unconditionally regardless of all my little downfalls and negatives. And I equally adore every inch of him in return. I bit the bullet and bought a car (with the help of my grandparents) and she is GORGEOUS. I love her so much, even if driving is one of the most difficult endeavours I have ever embarked upon. Finally, I decided I had had enough being at my job in Eastbourne, and decided to go for a promotion, which I then got! And yes it is in Brighton, which is 35 mins (at least) drive from my house. It is, however, a step in the right direction for my career, my living choice (I have wanted to live in Brighton again ever-since uni) and most importantly; it’s a giant leap out of my comfort zone! I started myself on a course of treatment for my anxiety, and I started this fantastic blog! Mica Cupcake means more to me than anything I’ve ever created. All of these changes in my life have been a result of MY CHOICES. I have made the conscious effort to change my life, as I wasn’t happy. And, whilst I still do have my moments, I am in a much better position and place than I was at the beginning of 2016 by far.
Which brings me to this year, 2017. The year of the chicken! The year I turn 24. The year my little sister turns 21! The year I start saving for my own place. The year I take another step in the right direction in my career. The year I pick up my Ukulele and begin to learn to play it! Finally, the year Mica Cupcake takes the world by storm. I want to read more, write more and learn more.
Taken from the Guardian Website
All of these things are fantastic, it’s great to want to take positive steps towards creating a better life for yourself. Because, let’s face it, you can’t change the world until you’re content in your own space and world first. Because who wants your baggage being lugged into helping other people? It creates an element of prejudice that affects how we express our opinions and offer support and advice to other people. You’ve got to take a page out of your own book before offering advice to others. On the other hand- this obsession with constantly improving ourselves, the whole ‘the grass is greener’ thing has proven again and again to be bullshit.
Why can’t people just be content with what they have? How they look? Where they live? Where they work or how much money they have? So many of us are so focused on what we can change tomorrow that we don’t realise what’s right in front of us. We’re too busy rushing around trying to get places and achieve things day after day. Why can’t we just live in the moment? We can’t we just, without sounding too cliché; stop smell the proverbial flowers? I honestly think that if we spent half of our time just stopping to take a long hard look at what we’re surrounded by right this very moment in time, without fussing too much over how we can alter ourselves to create a supposedly better version of ourselves, then relationships would last longer, houses would be lived in for longer, people would move around less, and people would just be happier and more content with their lives.
Now, you’re probably thinking what the hell is she on? But really think about it; you’re in a marriage with someone that isn’t necessarily going right, or your boss is giving you a hard time, you keep falling out with your siblings, or you can’t, no matter how much you try, stop eating cake. Yeah fine, if it’s a dangerous or life threatening situation, then yeah, get out, make a change, leave the job, move out, etc etc. But, if it’s something you’ve gone this long living with, and it isn’t actually that bad, then why just suddenly abandon it? Is there something that you can do differently? Is there a change you can make within this situation or relationship that doesn’t involve any drastic action? Maybe it’s something as simple as changing your attitude, or possibly just getting some perspective….
It’s so easy as a human being to focus on the negative things that have happened this past year. The amount of truly talented creative individuals we have lost this year, David Bowie, Carrie Grant, Alan Rickman, Prince! Just to name a few. The amount of disasters that have terrorised this world and shaken it to its very core. The shootings and bombings and killings. It’s so easy to lose hope in this time of darkness. But one has to remember to turn on the light at times like this. Because, as a species, we may be selfish, we may be consuming and greedy and cruel, but we have the biggest capacity for love than anyone has ever known. We care for each other and support each other in times of jeopardy. We learn and grow and evolve past the dangers and tragedies that have existed in history. We have survived. And will continue to survive and thrive for a very long time. We, as a whole, have the determination and fight inside us to tackle anything that comes our way. This tiny planet has experience so much change; economical, political, environmental, biological, even spiritual change in some cases. We have become so used to change that we are the ones who trigger it in our daily lives, we are always looking for ways to improve ourselves, either physically, emotionally, intellectually or financially. But maybe, instead of this, maybe we stop and smell the roses along the way, maybe we stop to watch that couple holding hands walking along the beach, we watch that small child play with his favourite toy, we lay back and let the sunshine soak over us and truly experience what it is to be alive. We take stock in every single little moment that happens to us, and appreciate what we have whilst we still have it.
I can’t help but reflect what has happened this past 365 days and realise, that, despite every moment of turmoil or struggle, that I have people around me who love and cherish me. And that’s so special. I wouldn’t be who I am today or be able to achieve as much as I have at the ripe old age of (nearly) 24 without them. My loved ones are my rock, paper scissors lizard and Spock. And I know that whatever I want to achieve this year, I’ll be able to do it with them behind me.
I mean it people; make 2017 the year you change the least. And try and nurture and appreciate the things you do have.
Peace and Love Cupcakers
Mish ❤
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